How To Handle Negative People!

Welcome back!

This blog/YouTube video came about after some pretty narly experiences with some nasty, hurtful people who will remain nameless but if you’re reading this.. Anywho, after getting past these people in my own life I oddly enough was asked by a client, ‘how do you handle assholes?’ When my laughter subsided I thought to myself ‘how do I handle assholes?’ So I investigated my actions and came up with, you guessed it.. a list! Steps I take now to detail with people who I will politely call, negative 🤣

1 Are They Important?

How important are these assholes? I mean negative people in your life, are they your boss, coworker, clients, sibling, parent, or friend and where do they rank on a scale of 1-10? 1 being Joe Smoe on the street and 10 being your spouse or child? Honestly evaluate what the mean to you and ask yourself, ‘can I live without this person?’ if yes then the next couple of steps are pretty easy! If this person is a 5 or high continue reading..

2 Is This Who They Are?

Another important question must be asked, is this who they always are or are they going through a difficult situation? I am not one to just cut people out of my life and I would never advise anyone to be so cold. After asking yourself and answering honestly you find that the person in question is indeed just like this all the time more on to my next step! If this negative person is struggling with loss, financial stress, illness, or what have you then offer a shoulder to cry on, a hug to comfort, or a hand to hold but DO NOT accept mistreatment. We all are struggling to fight our own battles but misplacing negativity or pain is not right! Speak up for yourself in a calm and level headed manor and see if this communication opens them up to being comfortable to talk through their struggles.

3 Try To Be Compassionate

This has helped me many times get over other peoples bad behavior and negativity. I try to see the situation from their eyes! If someone cuts me off in traffic yes I have the urge to give them the finger but often I make up a situation like maybe he just lost his job or maybe she found out her child is sick at school. I truly believe people aren’t wired to be assholes to one another, sometimes life throws stuff at us and we just react so having so compassion helps the rest of the world when people in our lives are having crappy days.

4 The Fade Out

If all else fails and you know confronting this person will end in an explosion do the fade out technique. Where you slowly ignore them, unanswered emails,text, and phone calls are often indicators that you don’t really want to talk right now. They will get the hint! I don’t like this one as much as I like talking through issues with people but if non-confrontational is how you like to roll then by all means do it. Save yourself time and energy pushing yourself to deal with this persons life sucking negativity. Maybe if you want over time reach out and explain but ultimately thats up to you!

5 The Unavoidable

If this is someone who cannot be ignored, the 7-10 on the number scale, create a reminder. So I often do this with people who I have to interact with that their negative energy often drains me, it really works! So when I know I am seeing them or interacting with them I create a reminder in my head and I repeat it every time they get on the negativity train while with me and it goes like this ‘this is not mine, this is theirs to own.’ I know it sounds crazy but it has gotten me through some really craptastic interactions with some brutally negative people!

*** Important:

These techniques and advice will only work if in fact you are not being the negative Nancy! Do a self check when put into these situations. Is there something I am doing to make this experience suck? Am I in fact being a jerk right now? Often we confuse perception for reality because well perception is how we see the world, duh! So really take these interactions as opportunities to become more self aware and sort your stuff out first!

I hope these negative people come around and if not these tips/steps help you to deal with them a little bit easier! Let me know what you think by leaving a comment or sending an email via the contact tab above.

Until next time, stay positive and stay Motivated.

Alicia💛

 

10 Must Have Amazon Gifts!!

Ho, ho, healthy!
The month of December is glorious and full of love which is why it can be tricky sticking to your healthy routine! Don’t you worry your pretty head because I have your back and with this month Healthy Holidays series 🙂
Here is a list of to all the items discussed for that special someone who is looking to get fit or to continue on their journey of a healthy lifestyle!

Wireless Headphones:
Skull Candy: https://goo.gl/W4qYku
Jaybird Sport-Sweat Proof Headphones: https://goo.gl/w5ZBc9
Jabra Sport Pulse Headphone: https://goo.gl/pPzJu1
Fitness Journals:
Fitlosophy Fitbook: https://goo.gl/gxZhXc

3) Fitness Tracker
Apple Watch: https://goo.gl/QuaLHj
Fitbit: https://goo.gl/z78EUd
Garmin: https://goo.gl/t3RSmE

5)A Good Gym Bag
MPG: https://goo.gl/deAYyt

6)A Gym Membership/Personal Trainer session
www.aliciakrahe.com
7)A Foam Roller:
Deep Tissue Mini Roller: https://goo.gl/UYx8So
SKLZ Trainer Foam Roller: https://goo.gl/4FHzAg
8)Measuring Cups/Measuring Wine Glasses:
Plastic Measuring Cups: https://goo.gl/5o2k8h
Metal/Magnetic Cups: https://goo.gl/dzAE2E
Measurable Wine Glasses: https://goo.gl/tUjTA9

9)Portable Containers
Bento Box Containers: https://goo.gl/VEmruS

10)Reflective Gear:
HiGo Slap Wrist bands: https://goo.gl/edhvNh
Reflective Running Belt: https://goo.gl/TPhZm1

Why I unfollowed “fitspiration” accounts😱

Howdy ya’ll!

I never really know if that is an “appropriate” intro for a blog so I just go with my gut and wing it haha! I hope you are all ready and willing for another dose of on my thoughts and dare I say feelings on some really important happenings in the world today. This topic  may not be as important as say the economy or the political unrest our country is facing right now but I do feel it is an important issue to address for my particular generation and generations growing up in the world today.  I have and currently struggle with my own self imagine and what popular media shows as an “ideal body,” I feel it is a common occurrence in women and have a long list of women in my life who I can use to back my claim.  I am not going to bash anyone or encourage anyone reading this blog post to so but I want to offer some reasoning as to why following “thinspiration,” “fitspiration,” or anything that is portrayed in popular media today as the got to be image of desirable is something I no longer participate in paying any attention to.

As mentioned earlier I’ve spent many years of my existence idealizing other women’s bodies. For years I wished, hoped, and prayer that my body would somehow take on the shape of a tall, beautiful, Victoria’s Secret model. As a I teen I would flip through the pages of magazines and think to myself, “why as my legs so much bigger than her, how does she do it?!”  This type of behavior continued until the popularity of social media sites like Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, Tumbler, Twitter, and Youtube came into my world and really showed me what stander of beauty I would never live up to.  I can remember scrolling through the images thinking “wow, I’m so gross or my hair never looks that good.” I was constantly comparing myself to an image, a very edited, unrealistic, or stage image of what I should be.

When the day came and I decided I wanted to change my life for the better, no longer living in an unhealthy/unhappy body. I often used social media and “fitspiration” accounts as motivation and/or something I’d compare myself to. Now looking back I wish instead I would have listened a little more closely to my own voice, my own body, and my own journey. This is why I hope to offer you some reasoning and guidance on how to unfollow your unhealthy obsession with “fitspo,” “thinspo,” or whatever you’ve been using to measure yourself with. If you’re thinking to yourself “I don’t do that,” good for you but I can almost guarantee, you are in a state of denial because it’s in human nature to compare oneself to others around. Without comparison how do you know what the norm is or what is safe or what is danger? I am not scolding you here for being human but I do want you to open your eyes. These images of fitspiration and health have been very altered either to sell you a product or a belief.

  1. Comparison Is the Thief of Joy

Theodore Roosevelt said it best and I truly believe this. Comparison steals from your individual and uniqueness that you offer to the world. The years I lost comparing my body to imagines that were cropped edited, photo shopped, and filtered I will never get back. Yes, this makes me very sad looking back on my younger years and the struggle I put myself through by comparing to these images and other people. When we compare we lose ourselves in trying to fit or trying to belong, by daring to be different we grow. This growth is were true joy comes from.  So by unfollowing people or programs that made me think things like “I wish I looked like her or I wish I was as successful as him,” I removed the temptation to compare myself. It had nothing to do with that person, I just refused to continue stealing my joy.

2 What Is Good For Them May Not Be For You

I often see Instagram models preforming work outs with thousands of followers commenting, I tried this and… or people asking them to show what they eat in a day videos. I am not knocking your obsession with what these people but I am going to tell you that their bodies are not yours. So their diet and exercise program that they follow will probably not work for you because well you’re probably not preparing for a photo shoot or a runway show. And if you’re attempting their workouts be careful please! Some of these movements maybe unsafe for you and I know I sound like your mom but really!

3 What Happens Behind The Scenes

So this is a biggie and for a long time I was in denial myself but after a few eye opening experiences I realized things are not as they appear. A lot of what it takes to “make it” as a fitspo or model or whatever is portrayed as “healthy,” is often really unhealthy. When we follow these people and idolize  their bodies we often ignore whats going on off camera.  Fat burners, plastic surgeries, unhealthy diets, and dare I say steroids are sometimes the means by which these “healthy” individuals get to your screen. So again comparing yourself to an image of a “healthy” individual who is currently eating 1200 calories a day, spending 2-3 hours in the gym, on a cocktail of injectables, who had a tummy tuck after their last child isn’t really fair, right?!

I don’t aim to offend but to help! I have been a religious follower of many ‘fitspos’ and ‘thinspos’ in my life and I really just want to pull the wool off your eyes before you waste another second of your life thinking you’re unworthy or unhealthy because you don’t look like so in so.. Life is way to short and beauty is something that fades overtime so realigning your perspective towards living a healthier, happier life is way more important than looking like your favorite fitness model!

Until next time guys, stay Motivated!

Alicia💛

 

Alicia’s Reads For Transformation

Good afternoon Motivators!

Lately with the weather becoming colder and the amount of daylight dwindling I have been reading and spending a little more time exploring the great indoors! This inspired me to share the books that have helped me grow mentally and emotionally during this physical journey! You will find that there is a common thread that brings these books together and that is growth. Growth to me is what life is truly about at the center of it all. I hope these reads inspire you a little bit to grow and change in a way that moves you forward in your life, enjoy!  **Side note these are not listed in any particular order, below each description is a link to my Amazon to purchase these awesome books!

1) You Are A Badass by Jen Sincero:

This was the first book I had ever read in the “self development” category and it was truly life changing for me! I’ve read multiple self development books in the last few years but You Are A Badass is by far my favorite! Why? Because it makes you feel like a badass, duh!! But really, it is a fun and easy guide to figure out why you are the way you are and how to help yourself change. It gave me the kick I needed to truly try and reach my potential and to realize even if I fail it’s better to have tried in anyway I can than spend my life doing something that is not right for me!

You Are A Badass How To Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living Your Life  By Jen Sincero

2) The Book of Joy by: His Holiness the Dalai Lama, Archbishop Desmond Tutu, & Douglas Abrams:

I can’t tell you how much I love this book!! These two very affluential men are so kind, down to earth, and wise! The Book of Joy is about a week long meeting between the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Tutu who are old friends and their special relationship is so touching to read.  The Book of Joy  is written in an interview style where the two men are asked the toughest questions about, struggle, strength, happiness, and all the wonderful parts of the human experience. This book brought me to tears, gave me a prospective on the world I had never had before but most importantly reading it brought me some peace and I recommend it to anyone seeking a new prospective!

The Book of Joy by His Holiness the Dalai Lama, Archbishop Desmond Tutu, with Douglas Abrams

3) #Girlboss by Sophia Amoruso:

#Girlboss is an autobiography about the very spunky and inspiring Sophia Amoruso who went from a troublesome teenager to CEO of a $250-million fashion retailer! What I love about #Girlboss is Sophia’s blunt and non-sugar coated approach to writing about her life. There is no nonsense spoken in this book it’s real and really inspiring to anyone, not only women! While reading #Girlboss I laughed (a lot) and also was inspired to get my actual life together and move forward without excuses! If Sophia can do “it” homeless and broke, I can work toward my dreams and be a freaking girl boss! Read if you are even a little bit interested in working for yourself because #Girlboss is a very real insight on what it takes to move toward your goals or bring your dreams to life!

#Girlboss by Sophia Amoruso

4) The Little Book of Hygge by Meik Wiking: 

First of all the title of this book is difficult because hygge is a Danish word but it is pronounced HOO-GA and it has become my favorite word! Though most of these books are in the self development The Little Book of Hygge is different in  the way that is a relaxing bedtime read. TLBH is about the Danish idea of life by definition hygge loosely translates as a sense of comfort, togetherness, and well-being. I believe learning about hygge and adopting the Danish way of happiness is extremely valuable to Americans. Our fast paced, go-go-go way of life is making us so disconnected to one another. The Little Book of Hygge is a good reminder of what truly makes humans happy, and that is closeness, relationshipss that are genuine and true. It offers tools on how to bring hygge into your life and like I said its an easy, cozy (who would have thought) read before bed or on a rainy/snowy sunday afternoon.

The Little Book of Hygge by Meik Wiking

5) Buddha’s Brain by Rick Hanson, PH.D. & Richard Mendius, MD:

Last but certainly not least is Buddha’s Brain. This book was recommended to me by a client who is just as interested in biology and the brain as I am so I decided to give it a read. I will warn you this is not a bedtime read Buddha’s Brain truly deserves your full attention and I am actually reading it for the 3rd time! This book really offers a neurological perspective on emotions which are often ignored or written off as irrational. Buddha’s brain describes the physical effect our emotions play on our bodies and offers a science based explanation for these emotions. On top of these well organized science based explanations Buddha’s Brain acts almost as a work book to help you work though your troubling or repetitive emotions. I loved reading this book, it excited the biology nerd inside of me and helped me quite my head enough to help my mediation practice for a little more peace and who would have though growth!

Buddha’s Brain by Rich Hanson, PH. D. with Richard Mendius, MD

I hope you with the cold weather headed our way you will take sometime to relax, develop mentally, emotionally, and grow in all the beautiful ways transformation comes about! I personally already have my winter reads ready to go and will up date you soon on how that is going!

Until next time brainiacs!

Stay Motivated,

Alicia💛

 

Finding Balance

Hello, hello!

It’s me again and I’m back but this time with a more in depth talk about something I feel is so important in life and that’s balance. I’m not going to feed you the idea that we can actually find the time to have all our bases covered or be some sort of super hero that no one is upset with or can literally do it all. What I want to help you do is make sure that what YOU find important stays in check. I know my clients can also quote me screwing the famous adage up and it goes something like “you cannot pour from an empty cup.” And I have found this to be 100% true in my life. Because whether I like to admit it or not I am a people pleaser, a yes ma’am, and will work myself to death to keep the rest of the world happy. Why? I’m not sure yet but I am getting better and better on balancing whats important to me and heres how I do it, sit tight, enjoy the read, and keep all negative comments to yourself ahaha! Kidding but not really!

1.) Prioritize:

For me this was a biggie! I spent most of my time trying to keep “it” all together, all of the time and when I realized that “it” was driving me absolutely bonkers, the thought occurred to me “how can all one these things hold the same value?”. There is no way writing a new program for a client and getting a sweat stain out of my favorite tee-shirt are on the same level of importance. Another great example of something worth prioritizing are opinions. There was no way I could keep my life together when I was allowing an opinion of some internet troll or some ya-who off the street’s opinion of me have the same value as a loved or dare I say.. my own. See, I have found by not prioritizing what or who is important can leave you feeling bat-s*** crazy because there are too many balls in the air for you to catch! If you find you are having a hard time doing this then sit your happy bottom down in a chair and hammer out a list.. we all know how much I love lists! 😈 Write down what/who are important and/or what needs down first. If its tasks that need accomplishing then checking them off of a physical list can be sooo satisfying!

2.) Say NO!

For Pete’s Sake say no when necessary. We live in a world where everyone is telling you to say yes! Say yes to this new friend request, say yes to going to this event, say yes to this new weight loss pill, say yes to the dress, good God the list is never ending! And I know saying yes can open you up to new opportunities, new people, new ways to better yourself but honestly when you are asked to say yes go back to your list of who/what are important to you and if you find said activity is not adding value to the list of important than please for your sanity say NO!

3.) Create A Routine:

If you feel as if your being pulled in too many directions add some structure! Creating a routine in your life that you enjoy will make you feel just the slightest in more balance or for a little while like you’ve got some control of your day! I find a morning routine of waking up 2 hours prior to work or working out adds time in my day for a cup of coffee and time with my puppies before my day gets hectic or filled with obligations. I wake up, stretch, snuggle my pups, grab my cup of warm coffee, and head out my front door sometimes (most of the time) before the sun is even up and I love it! Life can and will be unpredictable but at least have this part of my day together.

4.) Give To Yourself First:

This may seem stupid or maybe profound but giving to yourself allows you to better fulfill the roles you’re failing or struggling to balance! Again, you cannot fill from an empty cup! So carving out time in your day to care for yourself should be a top priority if not number one! And I understand this can be hard if you have children, a demanding work schedule, a loved one who is sick and needing your care. But I argue that if you don’t put yourself first all of these things will suffer. Your kids will feel your tension, your job performance will be subpar, your loved one will feel as if they are a burden, and I know you don’t want that! So, please for the love of all that is holy take care of you first!

5.) Remember, This Too Shall Pass!

Last but not least, if the world is on your shoulders, or if you’re feeling like you’re about to tip over, just like any hard time in your- life this too shall pass! Whatever is going on in your life is only going to continue right now! Change what you can to make this situation better but don’t forget this will blow over like it always has.
I hope you find my lessons (rantings) useful and maybe a little motivating. So get out there and tell em no darling and live the life that makes you most excited to be alive and until next time, Stay Motivated!

-Alicia K💛

Hi everyone!

Sorry this post doesn’t have gorgeous pictures, sponsored advertisements, or anything particularly eye catching but this is only the beginning! I’m more telling myself this than any of you haha I’ve dreamed of having a beautiful and well planned blog for years! I have journals, planners, and all sorts of stuff written and plan but never put to action!! I know, I know for someone so motivated how can this be?!?

Well I’ll tell you I am human and just like everything else I have started including my business I have done on pure desire and intuition. This post literally came to me about 30 minutes ago halfway through my morning run! I am currently sweaty and cold sitting on my front porch typing this out with my dogs staring at me waiting for me throw their ball haha!

But I feel it is time and I need to say this now. I am thankful everyday for a physical transformation that has taken root in me to a very emotional, life changing transformation. My story is a very human experience that has allowed me to share with the world and I can’t say it enough that I am truly blessed. I feel the lessons I have learned are worth sharing with the world and of course the people, like you in my life. Because why else are we on this earth but to share our human experiences with one another.

So, if you are reading this post, thank you from the bottom of my big, beat up and beautiful heart! I hope you find my life, knowledge, and lessons helpful in your own experience. What you can expect from this blog is similar rantings from emotional events during exercise haha, recipes I use on the daily and fun ones I concoct 😈,  tips and advice about exercises, emotional hurdles during transformation/growth, and of course more motivation than your little heart can handle!

Until next time, stay Motivated!

-Alicia K♥️